What a weekend!

Doesn't my weekend look like it was fun? It was...

We attended our second play party at Xpressions. We scened twice. The first time was a nice little spanking over a bench. A nice little warm up, a nice little touch.... I wore this cute little grey and pink business skirt and a grey vest with a sheer black shirt underneath, perfect to show off the sexy red and black bra I bought for Daddy for V-day. Plus my pink and black 4 inch heels... We left the bra and little underskirt on for most of the scene...

After, we gave ourselves some time to cool down. We waited on a space to clear.. It didn't look like it was going too... but then... Daddy asked some people that were just hanging out to move so that we could.... Well you can see the picture.... It was fucking fantastic... Add to it the fact that it stings (like a BITCH) anytime I move my neck... And well.. You can imagine that I've been in subspace for a while now.... Everytime I start to drop I/we do something to make it hurt again and down down down I go.

Yesterday we spent some time working to help move Xpressions from the old location (oh the party on Saturday night was the last one in that space, what a way to say goodbye) to the new, much much bigger space. It felt really really good to be involved in my community. So my next post will be about just that... Submissive involvement in the community....

Disappointing

I left for my vacation with the intention of spending some quality time with my family for a few days and then visiting Daddy for a day and a night to play and hang out...

 Well.. Nothing ever really works out as planned, I guess....

Quality time with my family is hard to come by. My parents are divorced. My dad is the kind of person that never really learned how to express emotions *especially* to an emotionally dependent and impressionable daughter. We barely talked while I was there. My step mother and step sister and I went out for some girl time and returned to pick my father up for dinner, which he refused to go to in favor of watching a pregame show. I left soon after we got back from dinner, and when I was leaving, he seem surprised. But I no desire to sit and watch football and be ignored...

Spending time with my mom was good, though it caused concern cause thought she's only 53, she is showing signs to older age. She is easily upset by change or sudden events, anxiety ridden when in public outside of her job. She's getting pretty forgetful and paranoid about things because she is aware of her memory issues.

My brother and his wife came over for dinner. I think this was the most disappointing part of my weekend, as the three of us exchanged maybe 5 sentences total between us and then they left, after only an hour. I only get to visit like once every 4 months or so, so I was really frustrated by this...

Spending time with Daddy was nice, though we didn't get to go to dinner like we had planned, do to me having an upset tummy. We hung out, went to a movie, did a little shopping. We did play a little, some flogging (he got to play with my horse hair flogger and discovered he really liked it) and play with vampire gloves. I was high and floaty and slept like a fregging rock. I woke up to a delicious breakfast. But many of the things I really wanted to do didn't happen, mostly cause i was exhausted and feelin a bit under the weather.

so I am back now, and have been for a week, but have been busy doin a bunch of different things. I plan to post again in the next couple of days as my head has been spinning with ideas and as of yet unexplored kinks. But I'm behind in my classes at Uni and Daddy has threatened punishment if I don't fix that...


Love and Kisses


kslave

solitary

I don't do well on my own. I don't mean i need to be constantly micro-managed (though sometimes i suppose i do). I mean that when left on my own with little or no communication with my dominant or significant other, i find myself bogged down my the quiet. Silence invades my mind like a fog of dis-ease, making my heart pick up its pace, my skin grow cold, and my fingers twitch. I much prefer the sounds of a busy home. The TV or music on, a voice on the other end of the phone (or computer), sounds of life.

Master is at the bar, and Daddy has been having computer problems and now is having phone issues as well. I know that neither is trying to ignore me, just that things have gotten in the way of attentions. All very logically i understand. But that does not keep my heart from jumping in its cage and my fingers from checking the phone constantly for missed signs of affection....

Here and Open

For a while i starting posting on a different blog, inthehouseofreason.wordpress.com and i don't feel like maintaining two blogs at once, so i will be shutting that one down at sometime in the future. I moved cause i wanted to make a fresh start, an open start. Instead, i shut down as quickly as i started... I begin to wonder if maybe i am just not the regular blogging type. I like having an outlet here, and it has helped to open me up with Master, but without a topic to post on every day, i tend to slack off. And honestly, i tend to slack off anyway simply because i'm lazy or busy. I don't know how long i will continue writing here, but somethings have happened in life recently that i need a space to talk about....

Master and i have decided to open our relationship up to other people. i know this sounds crazy to anyone that has read many of my posts... Hell the last post here was me bitching about him playing with another girl... It has been the topic of discussion for a while now, but usually in the form of finding a sister for me or just someone else for him to play with. When the idea was posed to me by an outside source that perhaps my jealous was due to the fact that i was not allowed (or never got to) play with someone else, something clicked for me. We went to a play party several weeks ago and he played with other people, and i was left on my own for the night. It was not done necessarily on purpose, but it was the way things happened. Frustration raged in me. Not jealousy, but frustration of sitting on my hands all night because no one wanted to play with me.... So following that, i posted up on fet that i was open to playing with others, that i was a sadist, not just a submissive, that i was here in my own right, not just as an extension of my Master. I also sent out a couple of emails asking others if they might want to top me. The next party, a mere few days after said posting, I was asked to top a lovely little girl in warm up for a scene for her later that night. After asking Master's permission, i quickly agreed, and the first scene of the night for me was a lovely flogging applied to her back ass tits and cunt, as well as making her admit what a little pain slut she is. Master was doing a fire scene with someone else in another room, so he didn't get to see much of it.... After his scene ended, he was asked to do a rope demo by the same girl i flogged, and oh! how my heart soared when he told her that he was willing to do so only after he had scened with me. Our scene was beautiful and intense and i felt more connected to him in that hour and a half than i have in a long time. I will refrain from posting it here, as i am still holding it close to my heart. We finished up the night by tying the little girl slut up and letting anyone that wanted to touch her touch her. It was incredible hot to work with Master in such a way... Not quite his equal, but not so under him either.

This was a turning point in our relationship. It made us stronger, and it made me realize that it was not the idea of him playing with someone else that made me freak, but rather the idea of being left alone while it was happening. As i started getting more comfortable with it, i have started planning finding Master an additional girl. Then we bought a bar....

Well... Actually, Master's father bought a bar, realized it wasn't as much fun as he would have liked, and gave the bar to Master. Suddenly, it took over all rational and civil life. We both have put a lot of hours into it, trying to get paperwork done and everything legal and up and running. We are finally making progress... But this as given me a lot of time at home alone....

Which is how i met J. J is a friend of Spirited One's Master, Asha, who lives here in the states. Friend is a bit of an understatement, they say they are more like brothers. They certainly act like it. Asha got me into play Lord of the Rings Online, and there i met J. And we clicked... Through one conversation or another (they are kind of blurring together on me at the moment) we were discussing the fact that Master isn't really okay with being a Daddy and that J thought that it was incredible hot... And well... I like him.. I like being his Princess... It feels wonderful to have a place to express that side of me in a safe healthy (?) way. I adore him.

Bringing up the need to define our relationship as open with Master went a lot smoother that i would have thought. I made sure to clarify that it wasn't that i didn't want to be with him , or that i wanted to cheat. It was ultimately his decision. I told him honestly and bluntly that there were things that we both wanted in a relationship that we couldn't give each other and that it seemed silly to limit our happiness by staying monogamous. He agreed. Just that simple.

Well... It might have been that simple for him to agree, but it has taken me a bit to adjust to liking someone else.... Okay more than a bit, cause i'm still not adjusted. But i'm working on that...

Weathering the Storm

the rain beat the windows and the thunder made me jump. i was shaking in the big t-shirt i wore to bed each night, wide awake. As quietly as i could, i crept out of bed and down the hall to the room next door. The door was already cracked, and the next bolt of lightening and clap of thunder shocked away my last hesitation. Mom was away on a business trip again and Daddy was sprawled on His stomach in the middle of their bed snoring softly, the sheets kicked down to the end of the bed. Soft blue boxers were the only thing that kept Him from being completely naked.

i stepped lightly over to the bed and stared down as the room was lit by another flash. Daddy was a handsome man with a soft smile and eyes to always looked down at me with tenderness. But no longer was i allowed to curl up in His lap, as i had when i was a child. Mom had said i was outgrowing such childish things, but i think she was jealous more than anything that Daddy reacted to me in His lap and not her. i was not ignorant to the hardness in His pants the last time i sat there. It just didn't bother me. i was delighted that someone thought my soft curves were beautiful.

"Daddy," i whispered in the suddenly quiet room, nervous that He wouldn't let me crawl into bed with Him.


His eyes popped open in the darkness, and His head rose only slightly. "Sunshine? What's the matter?"

i bit my bottom lip as i looked at Him gazing up at me in the near-darkness, worry playing on His brow. "Can i sleep in here, Daddy? The storm is keeping me awake."

"Mom would never allow it," He said even He moved over to make room for me.

i slipped in and cuddle up next to Him as He wrapped strong arms around me. Again, i jumped and gasp as the thunder outside clapped, the sound filling the quiet house. As Daddy ran fingers through my hair comforting me, i pressed closer to Him, breathing in His familiar scent, becoming more aware that i was in just a t-shirt, and He was just in boxers. my breasts pressed against Him, and He kissed my forehead. i could feeling Him growing hard, and as He started to pull away from me, i clung to Him. This was the subject of so many of my fantasies at night, as my hands and fingers worked at my own body.

Daddy looked down at me with a torn expression on His face, debating His desire for His young step-daughter and knowledge that it was taboo to want me this way. i tilted my face up to Him, pressing my lips against His, yielding as He did, opening my mouth to His tongue, kissing Him back. There was no hiding the bulge in His boxers now.

His hand slid down my back to my hip to the edge of my shirt and then underneath it to rest just on my naked thigh. i moaned softly into His mouth, letting one hand run its fingers through Daddy's hair. Suddenly, He lost is inhibition and was pulling at my night shirt, tugging it over my head to expose my breasts underneath. He pushed on top of me, mouth hovering just above one nipple, eyes gazing up at me. i squirm under His breath, the new sensation making me squirm. He flicked His tongue over the tip once, then again, making me arch toward His mouth.

"Oh, babygirl, Your body is so soft and sensitive..." He said right before His mouth closed over me and i moaned aloud at the feeling. He suckled at my nipple and i twined my hand in His hair, the other gripping His shoulder, squirming underneath Him. One hand firmly gripped my other breast, while the other trailed down my body again, against my hip and then the mound between my legs.

"Open your legs for me sunshine," He cooed.

i blushed brightly, but did as He asked. His finger slid against my slit, already wet and i shivered into His touch. He found my clit and rubbed it with one finger as He sucked hard on my nipple, then bit down gently. i cried out, and clung to Him.

He pulled His hand away and moved between His legs, pulling off His boxers at the same time. "Are you sure about this, sweetheart?"

"Yes Daddy, i've wanted this for a long time," i moaned again as His hand slid between us and one finger found my tight hole. He pressed on it just a little, wiggling His finger around, and my back arched as He stretched me out just a little, making wider circles, the tip of His finger rubbing against my inner barrier as He did.

"Still a virgin, my little one... This will hurt you." He looked down at me with love and concern and moved His hand away. He spread my legs wider as He moved into between them, His hard cock poised at my opening, barely against me.

i reached up and kissed Him on the mouth, mimicking His tongue darting and swirling. It encouraged Him and He began pressing into me. It hurt as He stretched me, seeming to fill me too full, and then He was at my hymen and still pushing. i clung to Him, and cried out as He thrust through.

He stopped and held still when He was all the way in, staring down at me. "You okay, babygirl?"

All i could manage was a nod. And then He was moving in and out, slowly at first and then faster. It felt like He would break me in two. But it felt good too.

"Daddy... Oh Daddy..." i moaned and He pushed into my cunt a little harder, feeling it grow slick with my juices and give into Him.

"Babygirl, you're so tight. My little girl..." i watched His face as he lost himself in me, pulling all the way out, then shoving back in, hitting the back of my pussy, His hands under my ass, pulling me up to meet Him.

i felt the pressure building, the pleasure building with in, tightening me more and i moaned underneath Him. i brought up my hips to meet Him, still feeling too full, but finding the pleasure in that.

"Please Daddy... Please fuck me, fuck Your little girl, Daddy..." i begged Him the same way i had heard Mom beg Daddy through the walls late at night when they thought i was asleep. He groaned above me and did fuck me then- hard and fast.

i felt orgasm start to erupt in me as Daddy slammed into and burst, filling me with His come and i cried out as He groaned and held on to me.

"Oh, my little girl, my sunshine, my baby..." He collapsed on top of me, still buried deep, and let me cling to Him.

i didn't even notice that the storm had passed.